The Unseen Life Of An Undercover Police Agent

Author: Undercover X
The views, opinions, and positions expressed by the authors and those providing comments on this website are theirs alone, and do not necessarily reflect the views, opinions, or positions of Confessions of the Professions thereof. By reading the following article, you understand and do not hold responsible Confessions of the Professions or any contributing authors for the contents of this particular article or story confession. Viewer Discretion is Advised.

PROMOTE: Place a Text Link on this Confession ONLY

I wanted to share some light on what its like to be an undercover police agent and confess the hardships and unseen real life encounters that are faced. I can't reveal my name because I still work undercover but I will give you a short BIO of myself. I have been in law enforcement going on 13 years. I started when I was really young at the age of 19.

The first part of my career started off working patrol for city and county agencies until I worked really hard and landed a job with the state police. I have been working in an undercover roll for the last 7 years and it has changed my life drastically. Dont get me wrong I love my job and it can be very rewarding however, I wanted to confess and bring to life some of the real hard truths about the job.

The biggest confession I have to make is one that is the hardest to live with and that is the way I look at the average citizen. It is hard to trust people when you see the worst of the worst on daily basis. Not to mention sometimes you feel like you can't even trust yourself because you live a double life style. Even though my job and work is for a greater purpose its still one you have to learn to cope with and stay grounded.

Undercover work is a lot different than what it looks like on TV where police and the good guys always win and kick ass. That just isn't so in the real world. I have seen many of my friends and closest buddies get seriously injured and hurt and some that never made it home to their families. On TV you always see the undercovers getting out of trouble by extreme measures which is possible if it comes down too it but in real life most of the time you get out of very bad situations by being able to talk yourself out of trouble. The most successful undercovers are ones that learn all cultures and races and allow themselves to fit in and feel comfortable around everyone they come in contact with and most of the time it is the very thing that gets them out of trouble.

Not very long ago I was working in the middle of no where and my assignment was to purchase cocaine from person X out of a "Trap House" which is exactly what it sounds like, a trap. I was already very nervous because I was not familer with the target or the area. I pull up to the house all by myself and meet three guys standing on the front porch. I greeted them and they started acting really fishy so I kept my eyes on them while walking into the house. As I entered the front door I noticed the three suspects reach under the porch and each grab guns. I'm thinking to myself that its over there is no way I'm leaving here this afternoon. I did the best to keep my cool and just started to make conversation. I continued on into the house to make contact with the main target and noticed that the house was full of subjects with weapons as well. I mumbled a prayer under my breath and did what I have been trained to do: make the buy and get out as quickly as possible.

I ended up smooth talking myself out of trouble by promising to spend a lot more money and set up a deal they couldn't turn down. At a later date the target came clean and told me that they had planned to rob and kill me that afternoon. He said the only thing that kept me alive was the way I talked and carried myself during the drug deal. I made several more purchases from him after the incident and ended up making a lot of cases by going back to that trap house. He eventually got charged on multiple counts and is serving life in Federal prison. I'm pretty sure he is sitting there wanting to kill me again now that he knows who I am due to testifying but it made me get to come home safe that night.

I try not to take anything for granted and appreciate each and every night that I get to come home safe. I have a very exciting job but one that comes with a lot of sacrifices. I have gone through long periods of not seeing my family and kids. Its not a real good feeling when your own kids don't recognize you because of your appearance nor when your wife wants to be seen with you in public. Hell there has been times when I myself did not want to go into public. People treat you a lot different when you have a certain grungy look. It was something that I have still not gotten use to this very day.

I have to confess sometimes I wonder why I do what I do. The only answer I can come up with is most people are smart enough not to do it. It is a job I dont want my sons doing and I will do everything in my power to make sure they don't. I felt like just sharing one of the many stories with you that I have and could tell. I hope that for those of you who appreciate the police and see them more as just the prick that writes you a speeding ticket on main street will say a prayer for those of us who work undercover and in uniform. I wish I could find the special person that prayed for me that day in the trap house so I could wrap my arms around them and thank them for giving me one more day with my family and friends.


Powered by ZipRecruiter

If you enjoyed this confession story, make sure you subscribe to the Confessions RSS feed!
You can also follow Confessions on Twitter.
You can also subscribe to the Weekly Confessions Digest.
Tags: agenciesagentassignmentcitizencocaineconfessionconfessionscopdrugdrugsfamilyfederalhousejobkidslifemoneyofficerpoliceprisonpublicrealsecrettrapundercoverworkworld


  1. Maverick Piznik says:

    Your life must be scary and dangerous an undercover cop. Living day to day, not knowing what is going to happen. Returning home and really appreciating the fact that you lived another day to see your family. Life is hard as a cop - undercover or not - because after 20+ years in the force, you know how people are, you learn how they behave, you learned how to read people, and that stays with you forever. As much as its probably great to understand the truth about people, you can tell much more about a person because you were trained to do it. But it also limits you in more ways than you could probably even know.

  2. Anonymous says:

    I have made big busts over the years. I had a police officer that I met ask me if ever I thought of me. Maybe when I was 16.. that was long time ago. God, I fear everyday that someone is out to kill me, I don't like it, but that's my Life and I will continue to make more big busts till I get killed in the line of duty. There are times I want someone to blow my head off. It's a scary job to do. Yet I am always undercover. I'm not ashamed of the work, it's the thrill and I can never quit.

  3. anon says:

    As long as police do their jobs as intended, I cannot find blame in them. The job exists for a reason and needs to be done because there are a lot of bad people, bad things, and bad situations. It must be hard having a life filled with a lot of bad to see.. I find it's like the line Two Face made at the end of Dark Knight.. There are no good cops; you either quit, die, or live long enough to see yourself turn.
    Respect should run this world instead of the drugs and oil (money) that do; Cops become Pigs when respect is forgotten.
    Either way, I appreciated reading this so thank you.

  4. Joe says:

    After reading this article, I'm very skeptical if you are a UC as you say you are. First of all, a real UC wouldn't be discussing their job on a public website that can be viewed by anyone, including the thugs you claim to arrest. Secondly, there are NO Law Enforcement agencies which hire at 19. The minimum age is usually between 21-22. Almost all applicants are expected to have previous military or college, because that agency will be spending a lot of money training you and paying you, so they want to make sure you are the real deal. Additionally, you would never go into such detail about a particular arrest on a public website, because a real UC wouldn't put appearing cool on the internet over risking the cohorts of the thug you claimed to have arrested finding out. Finally, no LEO would ever call another LEO a "prick" for handing out speeding tickets. A true LEO knows that that is not only part of the job, but also that traffic stops are one of the most dangerous parts of policing.

  5. zahurulislam says:

    Any person wishing to testify in support of or opposition to the application may appear at the hearing and give evidence without filing

  6. Undercover Y says:

    Undercover X,
    I can totally relate and I have been in situations like you have before. I pulled out of the UC game due to many reasons. The major reason was living the double life, it is a very tough thing to handle and many people that are not in our position understand it fully. The life of doing UC work is a large adrenaline rush that is satisfying in the end if all goes well. I worked to pay back society for the wrong doings I did when I was young. I have a daughter who now I need to protect and getting involved with some of those dealers is bad news, they know more about you then you know about yourself sometimes. How did you wife handle all of the "Double Life" living? Hopefully you still get these messages and can respond. Have a good day.

  7. Kevin Cordova says:


  8. eleyne says:

    i have a project that i have to look for a primary and secondary sources and i choose these one and i need to know when did you publicate these website.

  9. Supporter says:

    If you truly are as you claim, I thank you for all that you, every hour of every day to keep the rest of us safe.

    However, as poster Joe noted, your story has some issues. No jurisdiction that I know would hire a 19-year old. Most require at least some college now and especially at the state and/or Federal level. Either college or military experience is a must for most positions. As for undercover, no way a 19-year old gets UC work.

Leave A Reply

Quick Glimpse