Get a Confessions of the Professions pen today!

Dear Soccer Moms Who Work Downtown

Author: Anonymous
MyPost: create beautiful simple web pages in minutes with just a few clicks!
The Daily Dot Store: the leading destination for stylish accessories, gadgets, everyday carry essentials & more!
PROMOTE: Place a Text Link on this Confession ONLY

Read This Confession To Me

The views, opinions, and positions expressed by the author and those providing comments on this website are theirs alone, and do not necessarily reflect the views, opinions, or positions of Confessions of the Professions thereof. By reading the following article, you do not hold responsible Confessions of the Professions or any contributing authors for the content of this confession. Viewer Discretion is Advised.

Dear Soccer Mom,

Hi! You might've seen me commuting at the same time as you. I like to ride bikes. They're good exercise, environmentally friendly, and really very fun. I work downtown, just like you! Full time, just like you! I'm tired at the end of the day, just like you! Actually, you might think I look familiar. I probably look like your daughter, or your favorite niece.

But I only look familiar if you see me. Dear soccer mom in the SUV, please hang the fuck up and drive. Yes, that was a stop sign. Yes, I had the right of way. Yes, you almost slammed into me and sent me flying into speeding traffic. Dear soccer mom, maybe you've even met my parents before, it's a small world. Would you like to explain to them why their daughter died? Was that text message to your husband so important? Are you that eager to go see your children at the end of the day? I want to go home too, alive.

I follow all the rules of the road. For real, soccer mom. I'm a pretty responsible cyclist. And with all those flashing lights on my bike, if you were only looking at the road, you would've seen me.

So dear soccer mom, and everyone else on the road. Please pay attention. We've all had a long day. And I have a pretty short temper. Next time you hit me, I will get up (and, yes, I will get up unless you've managed to finish me off), and stuff my U Lock down your fucking throat.

Thanks, have a jolly commute!


the girl on the bike

Original Source: best of craigslist: Dear Moms Who Work Downtown

If you enjoyed this confession, make sure you subscribe to the Confessions RSS feed!
You can also follow Confessions on Twitter.
You can also subscribe to the Weekly Confessions Digest.


Tags: bikeschildrencommuteconfessionexercisefull-timemomphoneridesoccerSUVwork

No Comments

Leave A Reply